THE POWER OF RUNNING THROUGH DIVORCE

My sisters and that I didn't know exactly why our parents spent their Saturday mornings driving round the neighbourhood, strategically leaving water bottles along the way. We didn't know why they were gone most of the morning then exhausted once they came in. I mean, we knew they were running...but from what, we didn't know. Were they running from failed marriages or from the challenges of a new one? Or were they simply running to urge far away from us? We didn't provides it far more than a shrug of our shoulders at the time, but thirty years later, I tend to think they weren't running from anything, but rather running towards something.

Running may be a simple sport that the majority healthy individuals can participate in. regardless of what their level of activity is, they will roll in the hay. One foot ahead of the opposite. But the facility it's of remodelling someone into an entire new way of being is amazing. For my parents, some twenty years ago, it had been definitely how to make something different in their lives, as they tried to bridge two families together and make a "till death do us part" relationship. it had been different for them, as that they had basically not done much within the way of exercise in the least , and since they were healthy and already thin, it really became taking each new step together...one mile at a time. Almost like how they created their life together, with family meetings, way before their time and Sunday family activities, even against our will. But within the end, they became a Northern Alliance, completing almost a dozen marathons and becoming the "Home Team" for all folks. I think now, that running gave them far more than strength in their legs.

For me, running was too lonely of a hobby. All that point spent alone, meant time to believe the weather that was either too hot or too cold. It meant time to be deep in my head and uncover all the complaints I'd been dodging and it had been simply time to be alone...which I never really cared for. I prided myself on my strength and confidence coming from being surrounded by others. I used to be the "social" one. The one that was never alone. The one, I believe, that was too afraid to be alone.

Although I always figured out, I only ran when on vacation or very short on time and never quite three miles. I do not really know why, but I had convinced myself i could not go longer than that. Until the year 2000, once I declared that perhaps if I too could complete a marathon, it could act as a metaphor for my life. That perhaps it might create possibility in my life where I didn't know possibility even existed. Little did I do know how true that might become.

Just five years after actually becoming a runner, I faced the misfortune of getting to go away my marriage of 14 years. It had been an impossible decision; it seemed, to go away a person who loved me dearly, to interrupt apart a family that involved two fabulous children and to show towards a path alone. My unhappiness had been eating at me silently for years, until at some point I knew I had to seek out the courage to go away. I also knew nobody would understand. I spent that summer basically alone in my head, repeating my favourite mantra, "in the face of fear, I will be able to be courageous," but knew deep inside i used to be as scared as possible.

After an extended summer of learning to be a packer, a buyer and a seller, I quickly began to feel the strength returning to me. One step at a time, i used to be handling 1,000,000 tasks that seemed impossible to accomplish alone. But there was nothing that created more possibility in my life than the day the movers moved me into my new house. The one that I had bought. It appeared to take days for them to urge my furniture with great care, but even as the sun began to set, they were done and heading out with their empty truck. I remember sitting on the couch, just watching the walls, taking note of the silence of the house and therefore the silence of my inner voice. For a short time I didn't move, wondering when the fear would hit me, on the other hand stupidly, I went up the steps, changed my clothes and laced up my trainers. There was just one thing to do. Run.

I headed out onto my quiet new street without even my iPod. For I used to be alone, just where I wanted to be, feeling empowered and powerful. As I returned from my run and headed round the corner, I spotted my home and commenced to run faster and faster. Tears spent my face as I acknowledged that I used to be not running from anything either, but instead, towards something...my future.

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